Thursday, December 19, 2013

High School Students Ryan and Jennifer Break-up Official!

MOOSONEE: Think about where you are are this moment, for you will remember it forever. Ryan Polmeto and Jennifer Hutchison, the two grade 10 students from the local high school that have dated for almost a full two months, have broken up. After a heated argument over messages sent to Hutchison’s previous boyfriend, the couple is no more. 
Naturally, such a catastrophe will upset the regularly programmed events at the high school and, as news spreads, quite possibly the entire planet. As you would expect, the couple did not attend classes today and elected to not write their unit test in History due to the tragedy and the painful emotional aftermath. The group English project and the work period provided will have to be delayed in light of this shocking revelation.
They’re pretty shaken about the news, but teachers are being as supportive as they can. “What are you crazy?” responded their History teacher, “No, I’m not doing anything special for them. A couple kids broke up; big deal. They’ll get over it.” 
The former couple’s English teacher remarked, “Unless they get a doctor’s note, which I doubt is possible for heartbreak, they don’t get to rewrite the test. If I skipped every time I was dumped in high school, I never would have graduated!” 
The school community is coming together to support the two students during these challenging times. One grade 11 student, when asked about the couple responded, “They were dating? Oh. Well, I guess that sucks for them.” 
A grade nine student remarked, “Oh, good. My locker is right beside Jenn’s. Her boyfriend was always there. So annoying.” 
The community can further support these two students in their difficult situation by not showing any unnecessary happiness around them, by suggesting to them sad and conflicted pop songs to play on repeat, and not bringing up the fact that less than 1% of high school relationships last. 

No comments:

Post a Comment